Archive for February, 2007

27
Feb

Spring!!

Either the drugs are finally kicking in, or my brain finally found that hidden stash of seratonin. This morning as I was dancing around the kitchen to Dar Williams I realized for a bizarre second, I was happy. Not “this is nice” happy, but “Life ROCKS!” happy. The dance around your kitchen, kiss your kids, and ignore the whining kind of thrilling wave, that is rare as a gay unicorn in mommyland (for me) sometimes.

It could be that mommy and daddy found some special time. It could be that sometimes seeing President Bush fixing a medal on someone with a screwed up mouth, makes me think “this is what the bastard looks like in the sack.” Or it could be that work is like a festival of goofiness as we make ready for our annual auction. I’m putting together our slideshow and enjoying putting in dirty jokes, just so I can see my boss blush.

It could also be because I think Paige is the cutest little swearing mommy I ever did have the pleasure to instant message with…. and meeting someone with a bad mouth, a big heart, and a good pen on her is happiness incarnate.

I know it’s not sophisticated, or lush, or literary, but it’s what I have.

And it’s good.

25
Feb

Poetry Break

Because Mondays are made for Neruda:

Don’t go far off… by Pablo Neruda

Don’t go far off, not even for a day, because –
because — I don’t know how to say it: a day is long
and I will be waiting for you, as in an empty station
when the trains are parked off somewhere else, asleep.

Don’t leave me, even for an hour, because
then the little drops of anguish will all run together,
the smoke that roams looking for a home will drift
into me, choking my lost heart.

Oh, may your silhouette never dissolve on the beach;
may your eyelids never flutter into the empty distance.
Don’t leave me for a second, my dearest,

because in that moment you’ll have gone so far
I’ll wander mazily over all the earth, asking,
Will you come back? Will you leave me here, dying?

23
Feb

Got Monogamy?

serious-reading-ladies.jpg

Emma and I had our first radio show today The Hot Spot. Our topic was monogamy and we had loads of fun debating and discussing with the likes of Kevin, Paige, and Jay, the show will automatically start. Hang with it… we had some blips but most of the information is there:

Let’s continue the discussion. What do you think? How does monogamy work or not work in your life? How do you address issues that come up between yourself and your spouse on this topic?

22
Feb

Kinder Garden

women-priests.jpg

We’re shopping around for schools for the twins, who will begin their auspicious schooling debut next Fall. As a keener and total school-head overachiever, to say that I load a bit of significance onto this choice would be a massive understatement.

And tomorrow will be their “Kindergarten Assessment Test” a very intimidating sounding gate-keeping exercise for the local Episcopalian school, which I’m favoring so far above the others both for schedule (it’s full day) ratio (15 students to each teacher, compared to 28 per) and feel (I cried from the homey loving aura of the place). And there’s also the small matter that women can be ordained priests (HALLELUJAH!!).

School was such a haven for me… A world where rules were clear and achievement was so easily accomplished (hard work, tenacity). While I’d describe my growing up years as pretty happy, I did lack somewhat in the order amid chaos department.

So I’ll begin this huge transition to schoolyears with the usual mix of awe, and trouble, and happiness, and hope. And if my daughters find a love of learning and reading amid all the usual problems, I’ll be deeply happy.

20
Feb

DoorsWideOpen

Thump, thump, thump. Creak. Sniffle. Cry. “Mama?” “MAMAAA??????” “MAMA!”

Ergh. “Yes?”

“Sometimes you don’t understand me.”

Ergh. “I don’t?”

“No. Sometimes you don’t understand.”

Shuffle, shuffle, robe. Door open. Peer down at small serious face. “I’m sorry I don’t always understand you honey. Sometimes I don’t understand myself.”

“Oh.”

Hands, walk, walk, tuck in, kiss, hug.

“Mommy? Why is President Bush so mean?”

*PROUD SMILE*

18
Feb

Comfort

Some days when all worries rest on my doorstep, when missing the twins is sitting lumpishly in my belly, there is really only one thing to do: Make lasagna. I am not a domestically gifted sort. I don’t craft or sew or garden. But I do cook a mean lasagna.

0306_kids_lasagna.jpg

And the smell of it, wafting through the house makes me take a deep breath, relax, and feel for a moment that all is well. The comfort I can create is protecting my loved ones from the loneliness of life without a good dinner.

When the twins walk through the door after the weekend at their dad’s house, and the beds are made, and the food is cooked, I feel that for a minute I’ve done everything I can to make them soak in the cozy love of home. And for an over-achieving constant worrier like me, this is the closest I get to maternal peace and serenity.

What is your favorite comfort food to cook or to eat?

17
Feb

My Interview with Time Magazine Reporter James Poniewozik

james-poniewozik.jpg

The opportunity to interview the Time Magazine reporter who wrote about Gen X parents in the newest edition of Time (p. 39) has been a fascinating experience. It is so much easier now to access the media and other people of interest (thanks to email). The first and second parts of the interview are over at Stroller Derby (Babble’s blog that I write for).

Here are two of the questions I asked and he answered that weren’t published over at Stroller Derby. For those of you who are ever worried that blogging is taken seriously as a medium for intelligent discussion and pundit-ry, this will (maybe) put your mind at ease:

CRANKMAMA: How do you view the blogging phenomenon in relation to reporting for Time and the like?

JAMES P: I like it. I read a lot of blogs. And look, I’m an opinion writer, so as far as someone blogging their criticism of something I’ve written–hey, I got to say my piece, they should get to say theirs. (I have a blog myself, at http://time-blog.com/tuned_in/ — it’s more fun than writing for the print magazine.) Then they can invite me for a Q&A, and I can have my say further, and then they can further respond to my responses, and on goes the great circle of life.

One or two critics of my essay — could one of them have been CrankMama? — suggested that my piece basically was the big guy vs. the little guys, or big media’s resentment of little media. First of all, Alternadad–which I gave far, far more ink than I gave to Babble–is a book, which has not been new media for 500 years, and is published by Pantheon. That’s not exactly the SubPop of the publishing world. Second, I think the condescending thing to do would have been
to say, “Oh, I shouldn’t critique these online writers, they’re too small fish, they can’t handle it.” Writing is writing. Babble is a for-profit online magazine, just like Salon, where I was a columnist for two years before I went to Time.

To me, and I think a lot of professional writers my age, the distinction between old and new media is not that big a deal. I think some older journalists, your George Will types, are very concerned about the distinction. And frankly some bloggers are obsessed by it. To somebody who has basically used the Internet his whole professional life, it’s all just writing. If the checks clear, cool.

CRANKMAMA: Do you consider yourself a hip parent? If not, why not?

JAMES P: If I am a hip parent, the term “hip” is probably so devalued as to be nearly meaningless. Which of course it is, just as “alternative” is. (Who doesn’t consider themselves alternative? Everyone from the transgendered to Christian fundamentalists has a narrative in which they’re excluded from and put upon by the mainstream of society.) I mean, what’s “hip” today? It’s crap you buy. It’s what you have on your iPod. It’s basically defined by your ownership of Apple products. If there’s one thing I might change about my essay, it would be using
the term “hipster,” which has become so slippery.

Except what would I replace it with? It’s a catchall, it elides a lot of differences, and yet the people at Babble, the people at blogs offended by my essay–they certainly seem to believe that it encompassed them even as they objected to it, and that there was, in fact, some common self-selected entity that they belonged to. They complained about the term, said that it didn’t capture their diversity–but their posts were all linked to each other’s posts, and they blogroll each other, and they talk constantly about the “community.” But write a critical word about that community, and suddenly, you’re lumping them all together when they don’t deserve to be.

So fine, maybe we shouldn’t use “hipster parent writer.” Maybe we should use “Introspective, Literary, Urban or Formerly Urban Before Moving to the Burbs, Respectful of Differences About Co-Sleeping and Immunizations Parent Writer.” But I don’t think that makes a good acronym.

14
Feb

Pajama Party

Young children are sometimes like soft marshmallow pillows full of comfort (albeit smelly ones). After a long day or in the middle of a cranky one, we have pajama parties. We all take a bath, get in our jammies, and then snuggle on the couch and eat popcorn and watch a movie.

When the world is all rough edges and debates and wars, the comfort of snuggling in pjs is balm to the harried soul. V, J, and O, are my sweet triumvirate… the table leg tall rulers of my full universe.

I always joke with them that they are so cute I’m going to put them in a pie. Thankfully, they still let me squeeze and hug them and smell their stinky cute faces. I know it won’t be long now until all I feel is air…

**
In other news, the reporter of the Time Magazine piece on hipster parenting agreed to an interview with me. My very first!! If you want to take a look, it is posted here.

You can also go to directly to Stroller Derby now.

And thanks for reading!
**

13
Feb

Evolution of Civilization

“Ba Ba!”

“Gimmesum!”

“Mama, gimmesum nooooodles!”

“NOOOOOODLES!!”

“MAAAMMAAAAA, PPEEEEEEEEEZ!”

“Mama, peeeez noodles?”

11
Feb

We’re Here, We’re Hip. Get Used to It

hip-parents-suck.jpg
Ok, so now I’m officially a hipster parenting apologist (again). But really, you know what I am? Sticking up for the little guy, the picked on, the latest media backlash kicking bag: The alterna-hipster-whatever-parent.

Time Magazine
reporter James Poniewozik writes a scathing piece decrying the narcissism of our generation of parents, and I’ve officially swallowed a hornet.

Parents being more introspective and analytical and even intellectual about the whole enterprise should be reason to celebrate, not deride.

I suspect the author of the anti-hip-parenting piece is a Baby Boomer with an ax to grind. In any event, his analysis of the likes of Babble and Girl’s Gone Child (Rebecca is quoted in the piece) entirely misses the point. We parent differently. We talk about it before during and afterward. We navel gaze, but we also try and create a better world by building real communities where we share feelings, and information, and books, and radio shows, and silly t-shirts that get us sued by The National Pork Board.

Big media is scared witless because we no longer need Meredith Viera to talk us through whether it’s ok to have a drink during a playdate. The democratization of parenting information is at hand.

**

Meanwhile, Daddy & Mommy had a night away and I’m recharged and so much more relaxed now…. because of… the spa visit. Ahem.

**
And there is always this…
skyangels.jpg



We're Taking Over The World!!
More from BlogHer
Advertise here
BlogHer Privacy Policy
Get Red





StumbleUpon My StumbleUpon Page