Since January, I’ve not worked in an office. I’ve been writing and getting out to meetings, but mostly I’ve been home with the kids. We don’t do crafts or bake pies, but we do hang around and read books and are good pals. The girls are old enough now that they play made up games and keep each other company. Even though I’m a slave waitress (thanks to Mrs. Chicken for this perfect term), fight breaker-upper, and laundry ignorer, I still find minutes here and there to write.
I’ve tried at various junctures to stay home full-time with the kids and it has never worked very well. I would get bored, or resentful, or think it was impossible, but this time it’s working. Does practice makes perfect in this case? Plenty of other mothers and fathers ruminate on the pros and cons of staying home versus working, and most folks don’t have a choice. But once you have more than two children, the cost of childcare becomes prohibitive, and staying home more viable.
When I introduce myself to people now, I say I’m a writer and a mother and for the first time neither title makes me hunch up my shoulders, or launch into an unnecessary explanation of how I spend my time.
I credit sobriety with this change in attitude, as well as AA. Without the help of both, I’d still be the cat in a wool suit on a hot summer day.
****
- Many thanks to Karen (again) for fixing my broken down old blog.
-Today at Babble: Top 5 Worst Sweet-to-Sexy Toy Makeovers (Even Holly Hobbie is a tart!!)
- My book is up to 17000 words (many of them needing massive re-writes, but still)
- I’m going to BlogHer and I’m sharing a room with her.. I can’t wait!
This was just the post I needed to read today. We are moving by fall, and as the new kid on the block, I will have to start over and make new friends.
I tend to downplay who I am now, without a job to bolster my ego I guess.
I’m going to stick to your mantra and not explain.
Thanks, R. Hope your summer is off to a great start. (The NW was lagging in the sunshine department, but it’s mighty nice today.)
Good for you!Looking forward to seeing you at Blogher.
It is an accurate term, no?
I, too, introduce myself as a writer and a mother. The “mother” part always rolled off my tongue - it was “writer” that got stuck in my throat.
No longer. It is what I was made to do, and I am doing it.
As were you, and as you are. Good for you, friend!
Heya — found you through Seattle Mom Blogs and have been poking around your site. I like it!
I, too, have finally started calling myself a writer and I put “Mother and Writer” on all those forms that ask my occupation.
I liked your “threesome” post, too. Ha! I am in need of a Trevor… Seriously, having children has me questioning so much of how we have structured our lives… Why are we all doing this alone? I don’t get it and I try to bust through the barriers as often as I can and create a life that makes more sense (and gives me more sleep!).
Blessings,
Stacy